Lessons from India...

When most people go backpacking around the Earth they have many things on their ‘bucket list’ that they want to achieve. Some people want to see wonders of the world, experience free falling over a canyon, some want to learn about and develop a bond with people of different cultures, some want to gain inner peace, worldly understanding or ‘discover themselves’. Well… when I sat down with my journal to think about my number one aim for this adventure, I realized that what I really want is not something I might gain at all. I want to lose something. And it is the reason we started our journey in India…

I want to lose my need to have control over everything. And after one week in India, I am well on my way to achieving this. Let me tell you how…

Anyone who knows me will tell you (if they are honest) that they had their doubts about my ability to thrive in India. I am a bit of a ‘princess’ as The Boy calls me, and I enjoy being warm, comfortable, clean, well-fed and in control. Before we even left England I was feeling uncomfortable even with the idea of being on a plane for 8 hours… “What if I’m not by the window!?” (I wasn’t…) “What if it’s freezing on the plane?” (It was…) “What if we crash into the ocean!!?” (We didn’t!) All issues I had to deal with on my journey to accepting I can’t control everything. We landed safe and sound and went off to meet our driver. We had booked a driver and a hotel to stay in for the first 2 nights while we found our ‘India-Brains’. But…no driver to be found…

Trying not to panic, we found a taxi and asked him to take us to our hotel. Now, I am a paradox of naivety mixed with a ‘fierce-don’t-even-try-to-scam-me-I’m-onto-you’ sort of cynicism, and had read all about the typical tourist scams. So when the taxi driver took us to the ‘official tourist office’ on the way, I was less than impressed. “Are you sure you want to stay here Sir?” the ‘tourist manager’ asked. “It is in the slums and has terrible reviews…” “YES, WE HAVE BOOKED IT AND WE ARE GOING!” I almost shouted, determined not to fall for this scam. But then he showed us trip advisor and lo and behold, terrible reviews. Turns out our first experience of being tricked in India began back home when I booked the hotel from a website with reviews written by the hotel themselves, rather than actual tourists. Typical. So off we go in an autorickshaw, on our way to a hotel the ‘tourist manager’ assured us was a good place. The hotel was basic but fine, and we slept, planning on catching the train to Rajhasthan the next morning to begin our traveling!

But because God knew I was trying to learn to ‘let go of control’ on this trip, what we had planned was not to be. We climbed into a rickshaw and said to the man, “Take us to the train station!” Again, I had read up on a scam where tourists pay lots more money for train tickets than necessary at hotels and the best place to get tickets is the train station. So obviously, he didn’t take us to the train station, he took us… BACK TO THE TOURIST OFFICE! At this point I was close to tears. I hadn’t slept so good, I hadn’t eaten breakfast OR had a good old cup of tea, (my favourite thing) and I was also worrying about the fact that I had assured my Mum I would contact her when we had arrived safely, which I hadn’t been able to do!

The ‘tourist manager’ offered us a Chai. We accepted. He then disappeared for a moment, returning with no Chai. Then before we could wonder if we were getting any Chai, he asked us about our itinerary. When we divulged that we were planning on ‘seeing how it went’ as we journeyed, he laughed and proceeded to write out an entire itinerary. Before we could explain that we didn’t want to book anything up front, (my scam alert was going into overdrive at this point) he offered us Chai again. We accepted again. He disappeared (for Chai maybe?) and reappeared, (without Chai – I really just want some Chai!) with a quote, saying he had booked hotels, a driver and train tickets. A 2-week long itinerary, taking us all around Rajhasthan with a driver, into Agra and then train to Khajuraho, then train to Varanasi and finally, a train to Goa. We were tired, we were hungry, we were disorientated, we were really needing that Chai, we were confused and we were alone. My head was screaming “SCAM! SCAM! SCAM! SAY NO! SAY NO! THE MAN PROMISED US CHAI 3 TIMES AND YET NO CHAI APPEARED! HE IS NOT TO BE TRUSTED!!” 

But then… the Chai appeared! And it was hot and sweet and creamy and wonderful and our hearts softened and our eyes glazed over and we paid. Up front. In cash.

“Fools!” I hear you cry. But let me explain that this was the ultimate act of letting go of control. We had no idea if we were going to regret this decision or have the time of our lives. We were whisked into a car, met Anil our driver, and given a tour of Delhi before the long, 10 hour drive to Pushkar. At 2am we arrived at a stunning palace of a hotel in the small town of Pushkar. It was majestic, with gorgeous gardens and beautiful views of the mountains. The sense of relief I felt upon seeing that first hotel was immense. Maybe we had made a good decision after all. Anil was shouting for someone to show us our rooms. No-one came. We woke up all the drivers in the driver dorm. No-one knew where the staff were. Finally we found a light switch in the lobby. There we find the 'guard dog' and the receptionist fast asleep. They sleepily showed us to our room. Success at last! 

Our first hotel, in the courtyard outsideour room...

Here are some things India has taught me so far:

The Boy and I are mainly interested in looking at animals…

George and Baba...

We had the best time in Pushkar, riding camels in the desert. We plodded for bit and then enjoyed Thali (bits of this and that in a tray) made by our guides, watched the sunset, watched (and joined in with) some gypsy dancing, and met a couple from the UK. Did a bit of adventure story swapping. Wonderful!

There are cows and dogs roaming everywhere in India! We stop every time to look and talk to them. We went to a temple the other day, looked at it for about 10 minutes and then suddenly spotted a brand new puppy hiding in a bush. We snuggled with him for a while then returned to the car. Best bit of the day, that puppy was. At the same temple we spotted some monkeys in the trees. We’ve planned to bring home all the homeless animals and create a family back in the UK, filled with cows, camels, dogs and monkeys.
Everyone is welcome to come and snuggle all our animal children.

One of George's many doggy pals...

I was right all along about colours…

India is the most colourful land I could imagine. I like lots of colours and sometimes The Boy says I look a bit like a clown with all the colours I wear. But I am a grey rainy day in comparison to Indian women! They are beautiful! I have already bought 2 pairs of Jasmine Trousers in different colours. I love them and shall wear them for the rest of my days I think. Also, there are cities that are completely painted a certain colour! Jodphur is the blue city and the houses are all blue. We went up a hill fort and saw the city laid before us like a sapphire dream. But the most exciting thing is yet to come. Tomorrow, we visit Jaipur... The Pink City! If you know me, you will understand how excited I am to see this wonder with my own eyes. If I owned a city, I would also paint it pink.

This is a view of the blue city, Jodphur... Bit tricky to tell... But all the houses are blue, honest!

Being a white person makes you feel a bit sparkly…

In Jodhpur, I had my first experience of someone wanting a photo with me, and lots of stares from passers by. Felt very insecure and thought maybe I had offended the culture in some way, but then remembered that being fair is a special novelty in lots of parts of India so tried to feel special. Children are particularly interested, and laugh and wave like I am a Disney Princess. (Today I am Elsa, tomorrow, maybe Cinderella, I will see how I feel.) Today we visited a beautiful garden in Udaipur, but found it a bit stressful, as there was a huge group of Indian teenagers on a big trip, and everytime we bumped into them, (frequently) they stopped to take pictures of us. Some of them were discreet, (‘selfie’ with us in the background) and some less discreet (camera in face style). Some were more polite and asked permission (“One photo? Just one?”) but it made me thankful I am not famous.

This beauty was riding on a motorbike with her parents and I gave her my chocolate and took a photo with her...

Indian roads take some getting used to…

The street outside our hotel in Udaipur. Busy busy...

The first time we got into an Indian taxi, the driver told us “In India, to drive, you only need 3 things: good brakes, good horn and good luck!” I laughed it off and buckled my seat belt, but as we set off, I understood exactly what he meant. Cars, motorbikes, scooters, lorries, cows, goats, dogs and children all freely roam the roads and the sound of beeping horns is relentless. As I write this in our hotel room in Udaipur, there is a ceremony going on outside in the frantic streets, (in England, we would call it an alleyway, but trust me, this is a busy street!) and a man is banging a drum rhythmically. Someone else is ringing a bell, and someone else is waving incense around a shrine to Hanuman, the monkey god. There is constant beeping of cars, motorbikes, scooters and rickshaws. Our drier, Anil, told us that in India there are many rules for driving, but the first rule is, don’t follow the rules. Cars beep to say “I’m here, watch out”, rather than the British way, which usually means “What the heck are you doing, get out of my way!” 

Our driver, Anil :)

Anil is a fantastic driver. He is funny and helpful and him and The Boy have hit it off big time. They even have ‘in-jokes’, developed over their many hours side by side in the car, while I listen to music and watch the beauty and simplicity of Indian village life fly by the window. When I first got in his car I was terrified, but now, I feel safer on Indian roads than back home in the UK!

And that is the first chapter of our Indian adventure. I feel positive about the decision we made back in Delhi to allow someone to plan a part of our trip for us, and although I am constantly battling the anxiety that comes with letting go of control, I can feel myself relaxing into the Indian way of life.

And we haven’t even been poorly yet! Bonus!!

Namaste,

Hannan and The Boy xxx